Ubisoft has faced some flack recently, after announcing that it would discontinue multiplayer and on-line components for some of its more popular games. This has prompted the company to take a radical decision which will affect all upcoming titles at a fundamental level. Ubisoft has announced that every game released starting Q1 2023 will come with all multiplayer and on-line components already disabled. The reasoning behind this change was explained to us by company spokesperson, Francoise Nomefictive:
Essentially, we’re stripping half of the game away and we’re even making some of them completely unplayable, from day 1, because we think we can get away with it and face no consequences. To be honest, we were expecting a bit more of a backlash when we started yanking on-line components from games that aren’t even a decade old, but no one seemed to care. We even had some people and some gaming press defend our decision, as if we were doing everyone a favor by putting these old games out of their misery or something. It’s not like they cost us a lot to keep them running. The Assassin’s Creed Brotherhood Multiplayer server is literally an Athlon 64 stuffed in a closet. We could have kept it running for pennies. I guess all the years we spent gaslighting people into thinking that UPlay is a good thing have paid off.
Going forward, in order to access the on-line components of new video games, players who have bought these new tittles will also need to sign up to a separate subscription service that costs only 15$ a month. This service, called UPay, will allow you to not only download the games you’ve already spent 60 to 70 dollars on, but also access their cheater laden on-line components at no additional charge. Ubisoft will use the infusion of new cash from this business model to increase the hoard of cocaine available in the executive lounge and settle a few harassment suits out of court.